4 Comments

Softly

The other night I looked at my son. I mean really looked, with all my senses. Starting at his tiny toes, moving up the soft curve of his ankle and calf, squeezing his chubby thighs, nuzzling his tummy with my nose and cheek…

His little fists and fingers were resting in mine, and I marveled at each crease on his palm, pressing gently with the pad of my fingers the dimples on the back of his hands. I made my way up his shoulders, his neck, tracing the shape of his head and shell ears, lightly feathering his baby-fine hair. I leaned down to smell his warm, sweet-earth baby smell. To feel the soft skin of his cheek on my lips. I kissed his forehead, his eyebrows, his eyes and little nose. I admired the color of his hazel greys and he looked back into my brown ones. He cooed. He smiled his big, meltingly perfect, dimpled smile. Oh, that smile. My heart flip-flops. You know me, I think. Of course you do. Your mama.

This newborn time is so fleeting. I’ll forget so much. Sometimes I think back on what it was like before he was born, resting my hands on my growing belly, him shifting and pushing beneath my skin, imagining what he would be like. Now he is here, part of our lives forever. I feel so blessed, so grateful. Tears form. Words fail. But oh, how I love, love, love this little boy of mine.


5 Comments

Me

I am really tired today. Leo was up a lot last night, and while he’s been able to catch up on sleep during the daylight hours, I am not so lucky.

When I get this tired, it is harder to be positive about things. I start to question myself. I start to wish I had something besides mothering to call my own. There are so many things I wish I had time for, but I know those things are for the future and not necessarily the present…

Later…

Decided to get up and go do something productive while Leo was napping and the other two were out getting groceries. Turned out to be 10 minutes of yoga and 10 minutes of stretch & relaxation with a postnatal workout DVD I got from the library. I feel better now. I’m reminded of an Oprah video with Gwyneth Paltrow and her trainer, Tracy Anderson. Looking at Gwyneth’s body makes me wish my library had a copy of Tracy Anderson’s Post-Pregnancy DVD. Can’t believe its $30 bucks. Hopefully I’ll get started with a workout class at the gym soon.

It’s about bedtime. Looking at this rambling post I’m not sure if I should delete it, or post it. Today was just a regular day. But these are what life is made up of after all. Regardless, I think I’m going to try to make tomorrow better.


3 Comments

37 weeks pregnant

I had my 37 week appointment a couple days ago. Only two-and-a-half weeks left! According to my midwife I am already 70% effaced and almost 3cm dialated. Whew. I guess all those braxton-hicks contractions have been making some progress after all. Not much more left on my preparation to-do list, except re-pack the hospital overnight bag.

Knowing this is our last baby, I’ve been wondering if I should do more in the next couple weeks to record what pregnancy has been like for me. I think I’ve said before that I’m not the kind of mother who relishes being pregnant, but I do appreciate how special and miraculous it is. Maybe I’ll want to look back someday and reminisce. Belly casts are not for me (where do women put these?), but I’m thinking a few more photos and journal entries might be in order.

If/when you were pregnant, did you do anything in particular to commemorate this special time? Was there anything you wish you had done before you gave birth?


7 Comments

Hooray for halfway!

20 weeks pregnant today and only 20 weeks to go! Check out that belly self-portrait taken last weekend (19wks). Pretty big, right? From the look (and feel) of it, you might even think I was further along, especially compared to this photo of my 20-week belly when I was pregnant with Chloe.

One thing my midwife noticed at my exam was that I’d gained a noticeable amount of weight since my previous appointment. Yep, it seems I am becoming all belly with a side of extra butt thrown in. And a little in the face, too, I think. She kindly explained it away as “likely to do with the holidays,” but I can’t say that is for sure. When I was pregnant with Chloe I gained a whopping 40lbs. I think it took me almost 6 months to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight. This time I was hoping to gain only a healthy 30-35lbs. Perhaps with spring and summer coming, I’ll be able to keep to that goal.

Earlier this week we also had our regular ultrasound. David got off work early, and he and Chloe were both there. Chloe is too young to really get what is going on, but I like that she participate. So far everything seems okay. We got another confirmation that it is a boy, and I’ve been feeling him move around in there for weeks now. Soon David and Chloe will be able to feel it, too.


Leave a comment

Girls Suck at Video Games

My husband sent me this link today. At first I didn’t know what to think, but by the end I realized there does seem to be some truth to it.

Girls suck at video games / Les filles sont nulles aux jeux vidéo from Stéphanie Mercier on Vimeo.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...